i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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