where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
