remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
