I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize