So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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