Little spoons don't ask big questions
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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