Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
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