I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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