Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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