Hey man sorry I got all grabby
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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