Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
