he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
