How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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