Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
