"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
