Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
