Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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