Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
