if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize