I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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