Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize