He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
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we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
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I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
The ass gains better be worth it
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