I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
