Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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