And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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