talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
