we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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