So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
