do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
