worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
