she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize
