no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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