I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I could fuck to npr.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
