its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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