Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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