So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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