I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize