Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
We left an ass print on the piano.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.