What a fucking waste of an outfit
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
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Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
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Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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