so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
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A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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