No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face