ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
