Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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