Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
