I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
