I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I think I sprained my soul last night
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
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