Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
