It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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