I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
