But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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