Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
